The Ties that Bind
by ShayRose
Summary: Uncovering the truth behind her past, Revan tries to come to terms with who she has become. Aside from fighting to preserve the galaxy and defeat Malak, she has her own trials to contend with and a past that is slowly returning to haunt her. LSF Revan.
1. Marking Day One

Trembling fingers smoothed over the neatly knitted braid at the back of her skull. Today would mark day one, the first of many. In time, the auburn haired beauty would be forced to come to terms with everything she had done in the past. The night had passed in silence, a ghostly figure moving restlessly from one perch to the next. Juhani would have been proud. The bunks began to fill, bodies slung across each for the night. Instead of joining in, Revan, former Dark Lord of the Sith, made her way to the supply room, coiled up and sat amongst the canisters. Following accusations, acceptance, not to forget an assassin droid's unexpected revelation, she had found herself relieved to be alone. Even if just for a few moments, a few. In the back of her mind, she knew that they would be leaving for Manaan, looking for guidance. Bastila was gone, vanished. Captured by Malak or killed, though they didn't know for certain which.

Today would mark day one.

Here, away from the reassuring words and accusing stares, she found herself gazing at her reflection. Who was Revan? Recognizing herself as that person, that monger, was harder than anybody could have possibly understood. All she saw before her was a woman, perhaps too slender, with eyes that were perhaps flecked with too much gray and hair that perhaps had too much red in it. She had never liked the red, nor had she liked the gray speckles standing within her sea glass eyes. Mission had made a joke about her eyes once, claiming that they made her look wise. Aged, like a fine glass of Taresian ale. It was simple to retort back in curiosity of how Mission had even gotten a hold of fine Taresian ale in the midst of the lower city cantinas. The young woman, who was soon to pass her fifteen year mark, had turned the conversation in a different direction, avoiding it completely.

Was this Revan? This woman standing before her, gazing back at her. People recognized the Sith with that vivid, terrifying mask. They knew of her, though many had become conflicted on gender, race. All they knew was horror. A person, perhaps less than that, who had brought trepidation to their homeworlds. Telos was but one example, so many came before, many came after. The death toll, the blood that coated her hands, was immeasurable.

The subtle knock at the door reminded her of the world outside of her own head, the one where her friends waited. They wanted to see her, to know she was alright. Some wanted to glare just a bit more, remind her that they didn't trust her. Yeah, because that was necessary. Mission had all but clung to her side since they had left Tatooine, the young woman desperate to see to it that her friend was alright. After all they had been through together, how could she not? As per expected, the small blue face of the Twi'lek popped into view, a tentative smile quirking the edges of her lips. "We're coming into the docking bay now, they want clearance," she told the redhead, earning a nod in response. "Are you alright?" the girl asked, stepping fully into the room and examining the older woman. The taut image of a smile was replaced immediately by a look of concern, and Revan exhaled in a quiet manner. "What do you think of all of this?" she questioned her young friend, watching for shifts in her face, as well as focusing on her emotions through the force.

It took Mission a moment, seemingly taken aback by the question. Lips pressed into a line, Revan watched as the young woman searched for the right answer, the answer that would make her feel better. If anything could. "Well I..." Pausing, she looked up, catching the gray flecked green-blue eyes and holding them. "I think that it's just a name. You're not that person anymore, you're not _Revan_, you're my friend."

Momentarily, the former Sith gazed at her young accomplice and found her head tilting to the side in a sympathetic and grateful motion. "So... you're okay with it, then?" she questioned once more, stammering words betraying her emotions. There were few times she found herself in a place able to do this. Able to feel comfortable enough with anybody to let them see this side. The wall of sarcasm she had built up, or rather that had been encoded by the Jedi, crumbled and fell. Compassion, kindness, they all came second nature to her. It was this vulnerability, the one that few members of her small but strong crew had seen, that felt foreign. Perhaps it was something of the old Revan sneaking back in, reminding her of who she had once been. Again, Mission seemed to ponder the statement and finally nodded, her head tails moving subtly along with the motion.

"Like I said, you're my friend. You helped me find Griff, and then you turned around and helped _him_. I watched you back on Taris. You went and found all those journals, even though me and Carth were telling you it was hopeless. I guess what I'm saying is... You're not like all the stories about Revan. You're different. Maybe that's a good thing, you know?" A crinkle of her nose and a brief shake of her head followed. "No, I _know_ it's a good thing. It's a really good thing. Just because you decided to be called Revan doesn't mean you're going to go back. You _aren't_ that person anymore, right?"

A smile lifted the edges of Revan's lips, a nod bobbing her head lightly. "Right," she croaked, brushing strands of her bangs from her face.

"Then I guess there really isn't much more to worry about with it, is there? Come on, everybody's waiting."

Everybody was waiting for them. For her. Counting on her, hoping for her, rooting for her. Letting them down, letting _him_ down, that would break her heart. So without further ado, she reached out and grasped the metallic hilt of her lightstaber, finding solace in the fit of the handle against her fingers.

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**A/N: Alright guys, let me know what you think. Heads up for progression: it'll have very little to do with TOR because... well, this isn't canon Revan. Plus, I'm a bit of a romantic, truth be told. Reviews would be lovely! xox.**


	2. Just Like Taris

Betrayal was hardly a foreign concept to the Republic Soldier. In fact, it may have been all too familiar. Quietly, he remained seated behind the navigation console of the Ebon Hawk, his fingers moving effortlessly over the controls and his mind far, far away from the water world they were hovering through. Ahto city's vast expanse was growing in their sight, and with their landing clearance having gone through, they were now able to go in. Revan stood quietly behind him, her eyes attentive towards the great capitol city. Words didn't emanate from the woman, she simply stood behind him with her arms folded over her chest and her spine straight. Almost as if she had shoved a Gaffi stick right up there to keep it in that posture. After his outburst following the Leviathan, he hadn't found the right words to say to her. How could he apologize for what he believed? Everything that they had gone through, everything they had been fighting for, the Dark Lord of the Sith had been next to them the whole time.

Albeit she hadn't _known_ that. Still, if he had been concerned before, it was full blown terror that she was going to turn on them now. Betray them, just like Saul had to him. Mission had tried to convince him otherwise last night before they had retired. She had tried to tell him that this was their Revan, their friend. She had been with them through everything.

Admittedly, he had thought about that. For hours he lay listening to Jolee's incessant snoring and tried to summon sleep to him. Instead, he thought about the day Jordo had approached them on Kashyyyk and told them that he had seen Dustil. Revan, at the time known as Avangelyn Korr, had ensured him that they would go to Korriban as soon as they could. She held firm to her word, too. Of course there had been bumps in the road, coping with the Czerka slavers and trying to aid Zaalbar's homeworld. Carth had claimed to understand, telling her he knew that so many people relied upon her. Still, he had found himself angered by her reluctance to just leave and go find his son. His_ son_.

Following Kashyyyk's liberation, Revan hadn't hesitated to punch the coordinates in for Korriban. She had focused all her efforts, despite the lies she was being forced to weave, into gaining entrance to the Sith Academy. They found Dustil, his son. Guilt had spread through him for doubting her, but she hadn't flinched. Just a smile, a pat on the shoulder and a simple "It's alright, Flyboy. I get it," before she headed out of the Academy and into the tomb of Naga Sadow.

She had done all these things, these _good _things for people, yet still he found himself unable to trust her completely now. Not simply because of the name, but the weight that came alongside it. Revan was a warmonger, a horror. Revan was the cause for his wife's death, his son's feeling of abandonment. Whether it was Malak who gave the order or not, Revan was to be blamed. Though, it had never crossed his mind that it could simply have been due to the fact that he had the villain with him and somebody new to hold a grudge against.

Tipping his head to the left, he glanced sidelong over his shoulder. Averting his gaze still, she stared at Ahto and the docking bay they were fast approaching. "I haven't slept," she spoke suddenly, her voice low. At last, her eyes drifted in his direction and he pulled his away from her.

"What does that matter?" Carth retorted, trying to hold some kind of contempt in his voice. It was hard when there was that meek vulnerability she hardly revealed often. Revan huffed out a breath and slid into the seat that Bastila had occupied for so many trips. It struck him. "You don't know where the Star Map is." Not that they ever had a sure location, but right now? They had nothing. Not even a vague vision to guide them towards a possible location.

"I couldn't sleep," she responded, sullenly.

Carth's eyes drifted in her direction once more, a suffering sigh passing through his lips as he lifted one exhausted hand to rub the side of his face. "You should get some rest, then," he told her, turning his attention back to guiding the great smuggling vessel into place. "We need something to go off of."

Revan moved forward, pressing her elbow against a clear space on the panel so as not to push any buttons. Her fingers rested against her cheek, her chin nestling against her palm. He had seen her look like this in the past, conflicted and confused. Tired, exhausted even. It had happened in the Sith Academy while trying to come to terms with all the lies she had spun, trying to find ways to help all the people there. It bothered her that so many naïve students had found their way to the dark side, and every one of them she tried to help, many to no avail. The very same position she held now, she took when Taris had been destroyed, before she had gone to speak to Mission. The exact one he witnessed her holding at the Jedi Enclave when trying to decide whether or not this was what she wanted.

So many times, so conflicted and so silent in her own thoughts. On many occasions, he had found himself venting to Bastila while she sat next to him. The Jedi had found amusement in his ramblings on about how Avangelyn was the most frustrating, insufferable, confusing, stubborn damned woman he had ever met! One thing that the woman who had gradually become his friend stuck with him. _'What, pray tell, do you think she thinks of you?'_ It had been such a simple, lightly chiding statement. One far from her preachy and somewhat condescending ramblings, but it had locked itself in his mind.

What _did_ Revan think of him? Bastila knew, though she would never say. Her lips were sealed tighter than a blast door without codes. Damned Jedi.

"We can start by doing things the old way. Investigating," she told him. A gentle smile perked her full lips upwards, "Like back on Taris."

Taris had felt like an easier time, despite everything that was going on. Swoop gangs and Gamorrean slavers seemed trivial in comparison to Sith Lords and Star Forges. Carth couldn't fight the smirk that her smile brought to his own lips. It was infectious, and part of him always wondered if she used the Force to somehow make him smile. That seemed stupid, especially to him. The soldier knew it wasn't some mystical willpower that brought it on, it was the simple look in her eyes and the natural serenity that she dragged around with her. It was amazing to watch, just like he had told her it was during a far earlier conversation.

Korriban had been a lot of things. Desolate, dark, swirling and confusing. The bridge between Dreshdae and the path to the Academy, though? That place was beautiful. Hot sun coating sweat on their skin and beautiful purple skies that came from who knew what. Maybe just the dark powers that lingered there. It didn't matter. For all of its negativity, that bridge was a good place. It was there, looking out at the place that held so much darkness and finding beauty in it, that Revan brought to his attention how she had noticed he had been watching her.

Shocked by the accusation, Carth had grown nervous. It had been a long time since he had found himself so enthralled by a woman's movements, and Revan was no different. The redhead carried with her a sense of duty and yet she didn't force it on those around her, as Bastila seemed to. There was a difference within the two Jedi Padwans, you could see it in the way they walked. Bastila carried the weight of the galaxy on her shoulders, though it wasn't her place. Meanwhile Revan, who had all the reason in the universe, simply seemed to move through life as it came at her. They were so different and yet so similar. He couldn't stop himself from admiring somebody so radiant. She was like the only star in a bleak sky, hopeful and guiding.

"Only on Taris we had less riding on us," Carth reminded her, tapping a few commands as the Ebon Hawk drifted into the docking bay.

"Not true," Revan said, holding her tongue so that Carth could land the ship. With skill that only experience could offer, he put the great space bird down and looked back at the woman next to him. Her hand dropped from her chin and her Jedi posture returned, pressing her shoulders back in a regal fashion. It struck him long ago how easy it seemed for her to hold that stance, but how it didn't seem stiff or stuffy. It was regal, like royalty. Exhaling, Revan's smile slipped from her lips. "We had just as much riding on us back then, we just didn't know it yet."

Pushing herself back from the chair, she stood and adjusted her robes. "I wonder how much this one is going to cost us," she breathed, exiting the cockpit and leaving Carth alone with his thoughts for the time being.

They were tight on money. Between Canderous and Jolee's shared desire to find a cantina every time they docked and Mission's bounding off to shop for things that they didn't need on board, all the way to Zaalbar's mindset that they constantly needed more food, the group was slim on credits. Revan found things that she could do to earn more, little scavenging jobs here and there, but it was still hard. T3 had even made himself useful a few times and gone to fix other ships along the bays for credits. That was enough, he supposed. They could survive off it, as Revan had said many times before.

On Tatooine, Bastila had questioned Revan's reluctance to stop Mission from scavenging for shops. Revan had shook her head. "_What am I supposed to tell her, Bastila? 'Look, Mission, it's really sad that your planet got blown up and you're now on a potential suicide mission, but you can't go shopping __or have any joys in life, okay?__ Yeah, sure, you try that one._"

So instead, they worked for their money and did the best they could. It was hard, but Revan never once brought the credit troubles they were having up with anybody else. She still brought T3 and HK to repair shops for upgrades whenever she could, she still let Mission do her shopping, still let Jolee and Canderous go drinking and still let Zaalbar buy food like to feed, well, a wookie. Juhani, Carth, Bastila and Revan herself had spent the least amount during the whole trip. Carth had only found out one day when Revan was standing in the cargo bay, staring at the horde of food that Zaalbar had lugged in. "_This could feed us for a month! Fracking- We don't have enough for this!_" she had marched away cussing, leaving Carth to examine the store.

Through the window, he could see Mission already bounding off with Zaalbar at her side. Revan was speaking with Selkath officials, possibly trying to pursuade them to accept less than what they were asking for a docking fee. No vision, no sure directions to go in. Yup, just like Taris.

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**A/N: Little more inside Carth's head here. Thanks to all the readers! Reviews are appreciated. xox.**


	3. Going for Broke

The Selkath language was frustrating on a good day. On a day like today, their dialect was irritating to no end. The harsh syllables co-mingled with an abhor filled tone was all just a little too much. Silently, she willed herself to stay calm, follow the Jedi code, and yet still, part of her wanted to slap the one speaking to her currently and tell him to shut the frack up before she shut his mouth for him. Realizing that was merely exhaustion, Revan forced herself to maintain the grimace nestled upon her lips and offered little to nothing about what was going on deep within her inner workings. "I understand, Laalth, all I was asking was-"

"No, you misunderstand. You humans are all alike. Jumping in with your mouths before you listen to what we have to say," the fish-face said, staring her down with those beady little black eyes of his. Once again, she was waging a war with her basic most instinct not to tear him a new one or cuss him out. "I told you. One hundred or the gates to Ahto remain closed to you and your outsider crew."

Damn it. She had tried to get the squid down from one hundred credits to a mere fifty, and in some cases, it would have worked. On Manaan, however, it seemed that the Selkath were just being stubborn Hutts about the whole deal. "Fine," Revan grumbled, pulling her purse out and handing Laalth the credits. One hundred would leave them low. Not down and out, but certainly low. If the four big spenders of the crew decided to blow one hundred credits each, or more as they seemed to, Revan wasn't sure where they would land themselves. Long ago, on Taris she supposed since prior to that she didn't know what she had done for money, she had taken to rooting through any deceased's belongings that she could, taking credits and running. Carth's comments about integrity had gone unnoticed back then, but now? Now it bothered her more than it probably should have.

Speak of the devil.

The booted feet sounded through the hollow bay, bouncing off the metallic walls. "So, are we broke?" he questioned, glancing at the purse that Revan was shoving into her robes once more.

"Close enough," she admitted, dismally. "I can probably find some mercenary work around, I'm sure somebody wants something checked out." Running the palm over her hand over her cheek, she exhaled in only the most exasperated of fashions.

"Heads up," Carth said, jerking his head towards the bubbly Twi'lek as she bounced her way back over to the former Sith with her cohort of a wookie trailing closely behind.

"Revan! Can I have-" Revan's hands immediately flew up, stepping back.

"How about we keep the whole "Revan" thing to a minimum on planet?" she said, brows knitting. Truthfully, it had been her decision to accept the name that came with who she had been once, but she didn't need half the planet wandering around spitting up words of where she was. There were Sith here, lots of them. Already, she could see the charcoal gray uniforms down the corridor. "At least until this is over."

Mission's lips tightened into a line, a breath cascading through her lips as she shrugged. "Fine, _Avangelyn_, there, happy?" Silence followed, not even a nod responded to Mission's snarky remark. No way was Revan going to give the lippy Twi'lek the satisfaction of an answer.

"What did you need?" Revan questioned, fully prepared to drag her purse out again and toss credits they couldn't spare in Mission's direction. It wasn't much of a surprise when the cheeky grin slid up on the blue Twi'lek's face and her body weight shifted lightly from foot to foot. She didn't want to ask again, that much was obvious, but the girl still knew that Revan would be able to sense what she wanted. It didn't take a Jedi to get that much from the look on Mission's face.

"How much?" Revan added, finally tugging the small pouch out and opening it. "You're on a budget this time!" she added, quirking her brows. If Mission came back with any more clothes or holonovels she wouldn't read, Revan was certain that she would lose her mind completely. They were running out of space in the room already. She and Juhani shared a trunk quite nicely, all their belongings stored within it. Mission had _three_.

"A budget? Why?!" Mission exclaimed, huffing out a breath but dropping her complaints when she witnessed the brow twitch on Revan's face. She had seen that look many a time and she knew that she wasn't going to get anywhere at _all_ by complaining. "Fifty?" she questioned, grinning broadly at the woman in the most angelic manner she could pull up. From beside her, Carth was holding back the urge to chuckle as Revan looked down at her purse. Fifty could be spared.

"If you come back with any more stuff you won't use Mission-" The Twi'lek's hand was out and grabbing the credits before Revan could finish the statement.

"Got it, nothing I won't use, see you! Thanks, Revan!" Avangelyn had already gone straight out the window. Carth's guffaws sounded once again, this time heartier. The sound was refreshing, but annoying all at the same time. Propping a hand upon her hip, Revan twisted her body to face him. "What's so funny?" she questioned.

Carth's reply came in an attempt at stifling the laughter. "She's just good at playing you is all," he told her, shaking his head as his composure made a gradual comeback. Jerking her head, Revan headed down the hallway with the simple indication that Carth should follow. They had things to do, and she was more than capable of walking as she spoke.

"Playing me? What are you talking about?" Revan snapped, shaking her head. "I was not played."

Looking at her, Carth raised his eyebrows and smirked, shrugging his shoulders. "She's a pazaak player, you're the deck."

It took Revan a moment before her open hand swung out and smacked Carth against the chest, pausing momentarily at the feeling that surged through her before she allowed the hand to fall limply to her side, feigning nonchalance at the whirlwind of emotions running through her. "Care to explain?" she finally spoke, though there was far less assertion in her tone.

"Every planet we go to you toss credits at her. She knows you won't say no at this point, you're just creating a monster," Carth explained as he followed her through the _wooshing_ door that led off the docking bays and into Ahto City itself. Revan stopped, suddenly, her gaze flickering across the sun streaked room, reveling in the elegance that surrounded it. Fountains spurted up in the center and everywhere, crashing waves could be heard. Paired with the chorus of gulls overhead, it was just enough for her breath to be taken away. Despite the bickering that was sounding from every which direction.

This was the first time she had ever been to Manaan, at least as far as her new persona was involved. The beauty that it held was incredible, and a smile gently lifted her lips. "I just want her to be happy. She's so young, and there are so many things that she's seen and is going to see that I couldn't wish upon anybody," she finally said, looking over in his direction at last. This was a feeling she had missed, being able to go places with him without the looks that he had offered her back on the Ebon Hawk.

Things weren't going to repair themselves quickly, it would be a slow process. Both parties understood that they were going to need to figure themselves out, but for right now? Right now they were here, on this planet. Revan could have spent another year here were it not for the rest of the journey they were being forced to make sooner rather than later. "It's beautiful here," she breathed, the salty air that whispered through her lungs was more than enough to calm her. None of the other planets were like this, Manaan was a realm all of its own. Perhaps that was the draw, aside from the Kolto. People could find peace here, despite the Selkath and their fishy ways.

A sound bubbled to Carth's lips before he cleared his throat and stopped awkwardly, half stepping sideways. "I'm going to meet Jolee and Canderous at the cantina," he told her, the tone of the conversation altering itself from the easy-going state it had been only minutes prior. "See you later," he added before taking off in the other direction. Revan could have chased him down all too easily. Instead, she chose to walk the streets and see what she could track down as far as information went. For whatever reason, it felt like that was going to be easier said than done.

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**A/N: Reviews are appreciated! Thanks lovelies! xox.**


	4. Giving in to the Light

Disturbances rang clear all around her. She could feel the discord raging between Republic and Sith soldiers who walked the surface of Ahto. Each sector she made her way through, she felt it growing on her, berating her. It was hard to push from her thoughts and mind, and she spent much of her escapade wondering what it would have been like to have Bastila at her side. Her friend would have surely calmed her nerves and utilizing their bond. Not having that around felt like a piece of her was missing, washed away in the great tides of the expansive ocean laying before her. Metal rails surrounding the walkway supported her, her fingers grasping at it and holding on for dear life. Everything felt so overwhelming now, and for the first time, she felt truly alone. Alone with her thoughts, with everything. Before, even as a soldier, she could easily wipe those thoughts away. Upon the Endar Spire, she was surrounded by people who were the same as her, just regular soldiers who had been recruited for the mission at hand. The oath she had sworn to protect Bastila had been sworn by so many before her. The oath she had sworn now, the one to defend the galaxy and defeat Malak and the Star Forge? That one relied all upon herself and the puny crew of misfits she had stuck together. Sans one very important piece of the puzzle.

Perhaps, if she was lucky, she could reach out to the woman. Find her, _feel_ her through the Force. Maybe that would give her some kind of hope as to whether or not she was alive and kicking. It was all she could ask for at this moment. People and Selkath moved by now and then, but hardly any would notice if a lone Jedi went into a semi-meditative state upon the walkway, so long as she remained out of their way. They would believe she was doing nothing more than gazing at the water, reveling in the beauty that Manaan had to offer.

Closing her eyes, Revan exhaled. She breathed the Force, feeling it move within her. She could feel the heat that was emitted from each body around her, hear their discomfort and feel their emotions. Stretching further, she searched. One voice in her mind, one thought pattern, she wanted nothing more than to find the woman and rescue her from her once-apprentice. Focusing as hard as her body and power would allow, she searched for that voice. To no avail. Bastila could not be discovered.

She was gone.

Snapping her eyes open, she felt a lump build in her throat. Panic rose in her chest and her fingers began to tremble once more. It wasn't right, she had to settle this dark feeling within her. She was alone, though. All on her own with nobody here to guide her, to help her. They didn't know what to do with her now, Carth wanted to remain separate as much as possible. Mission wanted to shop, Zaalbar wanted to eat. Jolee, Canderous, HK, T3, Juhani. Juhani.

Breathlessly, she closed her eyes, searching for the Cathar that would be scouring the city, much as she was. Juhani may not have shared the same bond that Bastila did, but the woman shared other similarities. They were both Jedi, they could feed off the energy of one another. At last, the woman's footsteps came to her mind. She could find her, track her. Thank the Force.

Frantically, Revan turned and darted down the paths she had only just come, searching for the Jedi woman in her thoughts. Two streets, no one. There. Down the way, the woman was standing next to a fountain, watching it with a serene expression written all over her face. Glazed eyes showed tranquility, something that Revan longed for. "There you are," Revan smiled, encroaching on her friend's position. Looking up from her place, Juhani examined the woman. A different expression crossed her features this time, one of scrutiny and concern.

"Are you alright?" the woman questioned, the purr that touched upon her voice thanks to her species swelling the calm within Revan. "You seem... distressed."

If only the Cathar knew. "I was. I'm okay now," Revan reassured, stepping next to her friend and looking bemusedly upon the fountain that Juhani had found so intriguing only moments earlier. "I got lost," she lied, shrugging her shoulders lamely. "It's a big city."

Maintaining her scrutinizing demeanor, Juhani finally nodded, accepting the falsehood. "It is, yes," she spoke. "There is much unrest here." Both women glanced about at different situations occurring at once. Sith and Republic, Selkath and anybody, it was like an everlasting battle between them all. However with the Selkath laws in place, nobody could do anything about it. Tensions were mounting, it could be cut with a knife; it was thick and hard as Rancor skin.

"Join me?" The offer from human to Cathar brought a smile to Revan's lips as she jerked her head in the direction she had been in moments earlier. "I'm... Having troubles." Juhani's stare seemed to transform into one of disbelief.

The woman laughed, though it was a gentle sound, almost like bells ringing. Revan's lips quirked at the sound, her focus attending to the woman next to her. "What?" she asked, realizing how relieved she was to have Juhani at her side.

"Nothing, it is just... You, Revan, need help from me. It seems so... backwards," Juhani smiled, shaking her head. Revan's eyes shifted away, towards one of the doorways as it shuffled open for them. Stepping through, she looked back in Juhani's direction, ignoring the whispers of people as the walked by the cat-like woman.

People could be cruel.

"This seems odd to you?" the redhead asked, finding herself littered with questions today. The Jedi council had called her _ever inquisitive_ and she now understood why. Always learning, always trying to find new information. That was a trait from Revan before she had lost her memories, she supposed.

Shaking her head, Juhani's incandescent amber eyes met the flecked sea ones belonging to Revan. "No, it does not. With Bastila gone, I assumed this would happen at some point." Revan's gaze drifted, her throat tensing once more. "I am sorry, I just meant... The companionship shared between two Jedi. It is unlike that which any others could understand. We... _feed_ off one another. Our strengths, weaknesses, we understand them where others do not." Nodding, Revan smiled at her friend.

"I understand," Revan reassured her. "You're right, too. It's not easy without her." Juhani's silent nod was a compassionate one, words not needing to compensate for anything. "It's just so strange not having her around. I keep expecting to hear her voice and then... Nothing. Not in my head, not _anywhere_. She's not here, and it's like I'm missing something." Revan's shoulders slumped, the posture she had held for so long drooping. "I feel... lost."

At the mention of that, Juhani stiffened. Revan's eyes flicked over the woman's profile and she shook her head. "Not lost to the dark side, Juhani. Just... lost. I'm not going back, I'm going to find her." There was conviction behind her words, a sureness that could have rattled anybody. Still, nobody could doubt her. Dead or alive, Bastila would be found once again. "You know I-"

"Excuse me!"

The voice cut through the air, forcing Revan's gaze around to the ebony haired woman approaching. Her eyes were locked on to the two there, her focus attentive. "You are a friend of Jolee's, are you not? I saw you come here with him."

Immediately, Revan's interest piqued. "My name is Avangelyn Korr. I'm a friend of Jolee's."

Exhaling with relief, the woman offered a meek smile before her eyes welled up with unexpected tears. "I'm sorry, I just... My husband, Sunry. He's a friend of Jolee's. He's been arrested for a crime he did not commit. Please, if you could tell Jolee, please if you could do something!"

It seemed like a job for the Selkath officials, and yet for some reason, call it intuition, Revan could not turn the woman away. "Come with me. You can speak to him," she told the woman, resting a comforting hand upon her shoulder.

XXX

The Ahto City cantina was crawling with all sorts. Juhani seemed on edge the moment they walked through the door, and judging by the animosity raging throughout the joint, Revan couldn't blame her. Mercenaries stormed the place, being approached by Republic and Sith alike. "You deaf?" a gruff voice sounded, one that was all too recognizable. "I said I'm not a damned mercenary. Now get your Sithspit ass out of my face, hound."

A sharp laugh followed, adding to Canderous' irritation. "Move," he hissed, standing to his full height. Revan's eyes moved in Juhani's direction, nodding to the woman next to her before scurrying off to catch her Mandelorian comrade before he did something he would regret.

"You can't do anything to _me_, Mandelorian scum. The Selkath would be on you in an instant if-" Revan's fingers rapped lightly against the gray uniform before her, her eyes casting over the drunkard's face.

Grunting about how he didn't need her help in the background, she shot him a glare and jerked her head. "Look, friend. He's not a dancer, so how about you go try tossing your credits at somebody else, alright?" The Sith's dark eyes narrowed, examining her face.

Scoffing, the man tipped his nose to the air in an arrogant fashion. This, aside from all the destruction they caused, was why Revan hated Sith so damned much. "What are _you_ going to do about it?" he snarled, low and menacing as he could get considering he was two inches shorter than she. Revan was taller than most women, standing at a sturdy height of five foot seven. This man was hardly reaching five five and for whatever reason, that offered her some kind of amusement.

"As you've already said, I can't do anything here except publicly humiliate you. I mean, since you can't retaliate and hit me, what would it matter?" A red flush crept over his juma-infested cheeks.

"So, unless you want to be going around known as Bantha Breath for the rest of your days, I'd scratch gravel." Tipping her head to the side, Revan allowed a sick smile to creep onto her lips, the red in the Sith's face extending to cover the entire mass, including his earlobes.

Moving a pace forward, his nose nearly brushing hers in what he considered to be a menacing fashion, he examined her. "You'll regret this," he hissed, spinning on his heel and exiting the cantina in the most melodramatic of fashions possible.

"_Hut'uun_," Canderous snarled in the Sith man's direction before turning his attention back to his drink. Shaking her head, Revan moved to his side and patted his shoulder. "No more fights with Sith, alright?" she warned, examining his face for signs of disregard. None. Nodding, she returned to Juhani and the woman, who had now been joined by Jolee.

XXX

The state of affairs with Sunry had been difficult to foresee, even harder to come to terms with. That night, in the now-open hotel, Revan found herself renting a room and in certain desperation to escape the Ebon Hawk for just a few hours. A few. Nothing more. Breathing out, she brushed her fingers across her temple and examined the place with a sense of certainty. She would sleep tonight, meditate until she could rest. It was a possibility, more than certainly. Exhaling, she drooped down to the foot of her bed and crossed her legs, allowing the sensation of the Force to overcome her. Rest was necessary to find the Star Map. She needed the visions her sleep would grant her. With a calming aura surrounding her, the woman closed her eyes, giving in to the light.

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**A/N: Reviews are appreciated! Thank you! xox.**


	5. Pazaak

"Is that all you got? Come on, space-ugly, you can do better than that!" The small blue Twi'lek sat on the other side of the table, collecting credit chips that she had obtained through the last game of Pazaak. Nearby, her Wookie friend sat, focused on the plate of whatever he had ordered this time. Though he wasn't paying heed to Mission's minor gamble, he never let his attention falter from what was going on not two seats down from him. As the man watched miserably while his credits were taken from him, a wide, cheeky grin crossed the girl's face. "You had enough yet?" she quipped, glancing at her growing horde of credits she had collected. It wasn't like she did this often, but the bottom-feeder had asked for it when he bet that nobody could beat him. _Nobody_. Mission couldn't stand to back down from the challenge, even if it wasn't directed at her entirely.

With a forlorn expression, the man shoved himself back from the table with a clang and rose to his feet. Opening his hands, he slammed them palms-down on the table between the two of them and lurched forward. With all the Spicebrew pumping through his system, it was a miracle he could even stand. "I'm not going to let some Twi'lek _schutta_ beat me," he snarled. Who was he calling a schutta?

Never faltering, Mission let out a _tsk tsk _before shaking her head. "Bad idea, Bantha breath," she sighed, leaning back. A deafening roar sounded through the cantina before Zaalbar was at her side and towering menacingly over the human that had threatened her. Even the toughest of spacers backed down when an angry Wookie was leaning their way The man looked at the fur ball in all his bared teeth and fury eyed glory. Mission watched as he shrunk back, ashen and trembling.

It took all her might not to laugh right them. Instead, she shoved the credits she had earned into her pockets and pushed back from her place, standing up next to her terror inducing friend. The ruckus had earned attention, though people were already beginning to dwindle off upon realizing that they wouldn't get to witness a Wookie tearing anybody limb from limb. "Nice taking your money," she jeered, looking up at Zaalbar and jerking her head towards the door. "Come on, Big Z. We should go find Re-" Nope, she wasn't going to slip up here, "Avangelyn."

Reaching the exit to the cantina, Mission glanced up at the disapproving look Zaalbar was offering her. "What?" she barked, a frown peppering her features as they exited the bar. The streets of Ahto were quieter at this time of night. Only a few Sith and Republic officers scattered here and there, as well as a couple of Ahto residents. Shaking his head, the Wookie grunted, refusing to allow her an answer. That should have bugged her, but instead, she huffed out a sigh.

"Well he asked for it, anyways. Stupid dweezer. Plus, we got credits out of the deal. At least now maybe Revan won't be so huffy on the whole money front," she justified, bobbing her head in a nod. Although Zaalbar accepted the answer, he didn't seem to be exactly content to do as much, and his silence finally broke.

"_If Revan learns that you were gambling in order to earn those credits,_" he growled, his native tongue gripping so many harsh howls and grumbles. It had taken Mission a long time just to figure out what half of them meant, the rest were still difficult to distinguish from time to time. It was a work in progress for the most part, but she could still deduce what her best friend was saying.

"Hey! Revan _won't_ find out because you _won't _tell her, right? I'm not gonna tell her. Do you know how mad she'd be? It'd be like walking straight into a mynock's nest-" Ah frack. Down the cobbled street, leaning all too nonchalantly against the strong rails that surrounded Ahto, was a familiar face. The gentle breeze coming in off the planet's ocean played with her hair and her eyes, matching the darkness of the watery depths, honed right onto the blue Twi'lek.

Revan, in all her glory, stood and watched as Mission came to a sheepish halt a few yards away. With a push, she removed herself from her comfort against the rails and took serene strides in their direction. "Act natural," Mission whispered in Zaalbar's direction. The Wookie grunted, obviously not believing that Revan didn't already know what was going on. "Hey! I thought you were sleeping!" Mission exclaimed, moving towards the approaching woman.

"I was," the redhead admitted with a nod before her lips pursed and her arms folded. While Revan most certainly was _not _Mission's mother, by any means, she still felt like she had done something so bad. The disapproving looks she had earned from the Jedi were bothering her, and subconsciously she proved as much by shifting her weight from foot to foot. "The Force did allow me my vision, after all," Revan added, nodding her head. The look on her face was coy. Mission didn't like the coy looks, they generally came with all-too quick remarks. "So, I went to look for you guys. Imagine my surprise when I walked into that Cantina over there and see, not Canderous, Jolee or Carth, but Mission Vao. Sitting behind a pazaak table."

Amused, Zaalbar made a noise that sounded all too much like a laugh for Mission's tastes. Revan was quick to hush that with a look in his general direction. "You can also imagine how shocked I was to see her Wookie friend with his back turned, ignoring the whole thing." Her harsh gaze moved towards her large counterpart, brow cocked with displeasure and scrutiny. Smugly, Mission smirked in Zaalbar's direction before her attention was directed back at Revan as the woman made a sound, much like a sigh and a growl mixed together.

Shaking her head, Revan examined the girl's face. Obviously she was searching for some sign of remorse or trying to understand what the young woman had been doing in the first place, aside from the obvious. "What were you thinking, Mission?" she snapped.

Defensively, Mission took a step forward. "Hey! You don't get to tell me what I can and can't do! You're not-" Revan interjected and finished the statement for her.

"Your mother, I get it. I'm not your mother. Hell, I'm not even your guardian. I am, however, a friend who gave you those credits, and instead of taking them and going off to buy more _stuff_ like I thought you would, you took them gambling?" A disgusted scoff slid through Revan's lips, her eyes refocusing themselves towards the nearby fountain. The playful, turbulent spouts of water enraptured her attention for the time being and for a minute, Mission almost thought she had gotten off clean with it. Maybe that was the worst of it. "That's very Griff-like of you."

Taken aback, Mission's jaw gaped. Part of her wanted to fight back, tell Revan how wrong she was; tell her that it hadn't been to get more money, it had been to defend her honor! She didn't want that spacer to go around saying that he was the best when he so obviously _wasn't_. Yet, somehow, perhaps thanks to the look of disappointment drenching Revan's features, she couldn't do it. Even now, with the only light coming from dimmed out posts and low-lighting around them, Mission could see it clear as day.

"Revan, I-"

"Save it, Mission. Take your credits and do whatever you want with them, but don't come asking me for any more. Come on, let's get back to the Hawk. I need to talk to Carth and the others."

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**A/N: Thank you to Elira Rose for your all too kind words! They certainly made my day! This was another of those alternate perspective chapters, just something I was playing around with in my head at one point. The effects of Griff's lifestyle on Mission, how she deals with it, all seemed kind of interesting to me. Reviews are always appreciated! Next chapter coming soon! xox.**


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